For Men - How to Tell the Mother from the Woman.

What is written here is not new. But, as is usually the case with such insights, it is worth reminding ourselves of them from time to time: For men: In your life, you will meet several women. You will form relationships, perhaps even marry. But it is important to understand who is in front of you - the Mother or the Woman? Telling one from the other is very important. Outwardly, they may look similar. Both may have full breasts, look like a fragile teenager, a grey mouse, or a femme fatale. But deeper down - they differ from each other, significantly so. Because only together with a Woman can you become a Man. But together with a Mother - you can only remain a boy. A good or bad one, but only a boy. If she is ashamed of you - no matter what for - for example, that you hold your fork incorrectly or do not know how to properly use the word promiscuity. Or, for example, you did not greet someone at a party or did not congratulate auntie on her anniversary - then be careful, be attentive - because the one who feels shame is a mother. The Mother is ashamed of her poorly raised boy. The Mother will blush if Aunt Mirtante notices that her boy does not have properly clean ears today. And the Mother will faint if you publicly tell a crude and simultaneously stale joke. The Woman, on the other hand, clearly knows what belongs to her and what belongs to you. Therefore, even if she feels shame, it is rare and only about herself. Or about her own actual son. The Mother’s mission is to forgive. An adopted stray cannot be left on the street, so mothers groan, whine, lecture, educate, but will never send their “troubled child” to the highest authority - to God. The Woman says “I will not tolerate this” - for example, lying. And if you lie - you can pack up right away. The Mother, on the other hand, suffers, complains, takes nerve pills, and suffers some more. But afterward, you have to come to the Mother to beg forgiveness with flowers, and then - you can continue lying. Because the responsibility for her son is borne by the Mother. If your shamelessness, vulgarity, and arrogance are being tolerated, then most likely, you have formed a relationship with a Mother. But that is not good. You cannot make love with a Mother. Perhaps you do not know it yet, but you cannot. He (the other - main - member of your small collective) will soon figure that out. Intuitively. And then life will be like this - breakfast is on the table, shirts are ironed, a spare diaper is placed in the briefcase. Need anything else? If your answer is “no” - then very well - you are an obedient boy. For that, Santa Claus will bring you the naughty Princess. The Woman will not allow herself to be mistreated. Meanwhile, you can regularly drive a tank over mommy. Even together with your friends. Mothers know how to live correctly. They know everything. Starting with how to brush teeth and ending with what the temperature should be next January. Auntie-mothers are like thick folders full of rules. How to breathe, what to laugh at, what to say, and when to keep quiet. Sometimes that can be very convenient, but be careful. Think - what kind of rules are those? Are you willing to pay for having your boots pulled off when you are drunk by giving up the freedom of choice in life? Is that not too expensive? You can recognize the Mother by the words “I have devoted to you…” - youth, the best years, or health. In any case, something that you can never return. You have an unpayable debt that continuously grows. The Woman will say: “thank you for the flowers.” The Mother will say: “Well, finally! You must have done something wrong. Did you think of it yourself, or did someone tell you? I hope from now on you will always bring me flowers!” And she will go off to make meatballs. Because that is the Mother’s task - to feed her rascal. But the Woman’s task is different. And once you stop being an irresponsible boy who needs to be taken care of, then you have a chance. A chance to meet a Woman and become a Man. Freely translated from http://www.proza.ru/2013/12/13/28. Author: Maya Shchepina

Addendum:

To immediately answer all the women who are looking for a way to be more of a Woman than a Mother to their men, I recommend starting with Clarissa Pinkola Estes’ book Women Who Run with the Wolves (Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Women Who Run with Wolves).